Entry #2: Behind The Bokeh

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Bokeh – aesthetic quality of the blur produced in the out-of-focus parts of an image produced by a lens (wikipedia)

I always loved pictures featuring the bokeh style. For me, it’s just really beautiful.

As the definition suggests, the beauty of bokeh is created when there is blur or out-of-focus capture of the camera. It is beautiful in its blurriness, it is beautiful in the eyes of the viewer, the outsider, the bystander, the third person, the person just looking at the output of the image.

But behind the bokeh, there is an image, a person – waiting to be known.

Behind the bokeh, behind its beauty, there is a story – waiting to be told, waiting to be discovered, waiting to be cleared and focused in. That behind its facade, there are stories deep within it which may be good or bad, happy or tragic, of triumph or failure, of conquering or trying, of winning or losing, of hoping or giving up.

It is one of those ‘contemplating days’ that an epiphany hit me.

I realized that maybe from the perspective of those people who see and know that we are studying law, the idea and grandiose of pursuing the profession, is like bokeh to them. That maybe to them, who knows not intimately the struggles of a law student, see that the endeavor is fun, cool, it’s freaking bragging rights, and just utterly amazing. That on the outside, from an out-of-focus view it seems cool and easy, but zooming in, tells the tale of conquest and perseverance which paints more truth, vividness and color than the bokeh in the picture.

It is even because of this perspective that some may even be aggressive or bitter towards us, or simply put, making our lives miserable, either in workplace, home, or etc. This animosity that arises from the idea that we are dreaming too much, too high than we can reach.. but it’s too far-fetched only for limited minds, too rebellious only for conservative minds, too ambitious only for mediocre minds, too optimistic only for cynical minds, too feminist only for pre-historic minds, too hopeful only for cold and timid souls.

If only they knew that we had sacrifices to make, that as in every endeavor and pursuit in life, opportunity costs are ever present. That everyday we chose to fight for things we believe in, and being a lawyer is one of them.

It is this bokeh, that people, clients, treat lawyers harsh – referred as animals, money mongers, vile, liars, ruthless heartless people. They think that all lawyers are always in it for the money, the fame, the prestige, the glitters and the gold. They only see and judge base on the four-lettered word prefixed to the names, without looking beyond it and in the life that transpired in order to earn that title, to keep that title, to be worthy of that title. It is this bokeh, that lawyers as officers of justice, defending the rights of both the plaintiff and the defendant, the victim and the accused, are judged, shamed and shunned for their services to the people and to the profession they have sworn to defend and protect.

Interestingly, it is this bokeh that leads us to compare ourselves with others – with our full-time classmates, with our working law student classmates, with our friends, with ourselves  5-10 years from now had we not have gone to law school. It is this clouded, blurred and misguided idea that we are no better than others that make us envious of the life they have, that we ask why in the world have we not been born with such wittiness or intelligence or luxury of time or money.

Truth is, we all have our individual pros and cons. (things we know that others don’t, and things that others know that we don’t) But the secret of those who succeed? They do not care. They accept the things they don’t have right now, and make good use of what they do have. As compared to those whose eyes are forever set on the bokeh, those who wished and wished and lamented on their existence, not realizing they have potentials and skills, if only they stopped being starstruck with the bokeh of others they themselves have created.

It’s high time for a change of perspective. Time to look at the big picture. Time to face reality and responsibilities. Time for High-Definition 😉

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